Self-Regulated Learning (SRL) Lab at Utah State University

As parents, we want our children to learn the necessary skills for managing their attention, emotions, and behavior.  Our life experiences have taught us how essential these skills are for academic accomplishment, successful relationships, and community involvement.  We have also experienced, as parents, frustration and wearinenss when our attempts to instill these skills in our children are unsuccessful.

Self-regulation is the set of skills needed to manage our attention, emotions, and behavior. Research and best practice for these skills can be found under other headings, such as executive functioning, behavior management, self-control, and habits of mind.  This website draws on that research, best practice, and our experience as parents to provide a resource for learning how to help your child develop self-regulation skills. Understand from the outset that achieving self-regulation skills is a process. So, relax.  Take a deep breath. Most of the time, we can help our children develop better self-regulation skills. But, the process takes time, planning, and persistence.

Often, when developing self-regulation skills, we are working on changing a habit.  Or, more accurately, we must work on replacing an ineffective or maladaptive habit with a positive habit.  Think about your own experiences.  Remember when you tried to change one of your own habits--losing weight, exercising more, organizing your finances.  If you were succesful, it probably was not an easy change and you probably had setbacks.  Your child is likely to go through similar setbacks when changing habits. Don't give up. You or your child may need to re-commit energy to achieving the goal, change strategies, or carefully reflect on your progress to attain a better understanding of the reasons behind the tenacity of the habit you want to purge.

Sometimes, instead of changing a habit, we must develop a new skill in order to self-regulate.  Again, we have all experienced what it takes to learn how to ski or bowl or roller skate.  We have also had to learn how to use new software programs at work or to follow a new protocol for doing our jobs.  Effort, overcoming obstacles, and persistence, are all important.  It may also be necessary for us to have a mindful plan on how to develop the skill.  

When we are ready to make a change in our lives and self-regulate our actions, we go through a series of steps of preparing, taking action, reflecting, making revisions, and maintaining over time.